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endgame.

trigger warning: suicide june 23rd - i planned to end my life by jumping off of my roof. i don't know what saved me, but that fact that i did, tells me that Allah has something in store for me. i had written two separate letters, one to you, and one to my family. this is the letter i planned to leave you with. dear a, where do i start? where do u end? ei naam'er ekta playlist o banaisilam ami spotify teh. raate baranday boshe akash er dike takay tomar kotha bhabtam, ei playlist iktu shuntam, ar kadtam. all my life, my parents have pushed me towards religion, and i think this is one of the fundamental reasons that I've strayed so far from it. ami tomake eta phone eo bolsi monehoy. but on that one night in october, i remember tumi amake namaz roja niye boltesila, and something in me changed oidin. oidin theke je namaz dhorlam, ajke porjonto chari nai. er majhkhane tomar jonno je koto dua korsi, koi fota chokher pani porse, hishab nai. emnitei maths e ato bhalo nah ami, cross

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